YOUR Religious Beliefs Won't SAVE Or CONDEMN

   I grew up as a PK (preacher's kid) in a large church, so I was raised as a Southern Baptist Christian. I then went off to college and fell in love with a girl that attended Mass so I converted to Catholicism. After college, I found a career I loved and traveled the world, spending a considerable amount of time in the Middle East and befriended some Muslims so I converted to Islam. As I continued into my adulthood I experienced personal loses and questioned how "blessed" I truly was. So I abandoned the religious teachings I had been privy to for majority of my life and for a time I was also an avid atheist. I have had the rare opportunity to be exposed to some of the world's most dominate religions. Now as a young man well into in my early 50's I no longer claim a specified religion. I now consider myself to be spiritual.

   I refuse to label myself as completely dedicated to one particular religion. Because I have learned from different faiths and have been deeply affected by all of them. I realized that religion is a person's or culture's way of believing in something greater than themselves. And based on that principal I realized that all religions in my opinion share a common bond...faith. That faith reinforces their beliefs that if they live right and do right they will be rewarded in this life and in the next life that exists after the physical body passes away. Having had the pleasure to fellowship and worship with numerous people of vastly different religious beliefs it truly pains me to see some many other people being hateful toward each other all in the name of religious freedom.

   I have never understood how a person claims to have received the enlightenment of a higher power but behave in such a despicably low manner. I guess it's true that people fear what they don't understand and they hate what they can't conquer. After my experiences I am determined to continue learning about various beliefs. And with that knowledge I hope to gain a higher respect for the religious beliefs that others have but as for me I will remain forever spiritual. Like my father told me when I was a young boy "believe what you choose and make your own decisions because I don't have a heaven or a hell to put you in". So remember when you are pushing your beliefs on other people and/or disrespecting theirs... understand that your religious beliefs don't save or condemn.


Be BETTER TODAY, than you were yesterday.
TWIL

I Would Have DIED A RACIST

   When I was growing up I played with any kids that were willing to play with me. I knew we all looked different and that some of us were boys and girls for a reason but none of that mattered to me. Then one day everything changed. My mother told me that I couldn't go with one of my friends when he came over to play. She said that my father would not approve of me playing with someone who wasn't like me. I didn't understand at first but after being repeatedly told to only play with kids that looked like me I began to notice and pay attention to the differences that we all shared. One day I went to my father and told him that I liked playing with my friends even though they looked different from me. I remember my father coldly saying to me "listen we only mix with our own kind. If the color of their skin doesn't match yours you stay away from them you got it!' I remember being really hurt and crying a lot after he told me that because one of my very best friends in school had a different skin color than me. I liked her. She was always nice to me. But because her skin's color wasn't the same as mine I couldn't play with her anymore. As I got older I got over my disappointment and came to accept and believe my father's views. I accepted that people of different skin colors shouldn't mix. My father's words would always play in my mind whenever I met or was introduced to someone that didn't look like me. Because of how I was raised I went through my adult life with a certain mind set that some people would refer to as being racist. I ignored them because they just didn't understand the simple concept that people of the world had different skin colors for a reason and that reason was for us to identify and keep to our own kind. I admit I experienced some problems but for the majority I was able to live my life by only associating with people of my own kind and I actually preferred it that way. I stayed in the small town I grew up in eventually moving into my parent's home when they died. Being the only child I admit it was hard not having any surviving family members around me but I managed. Eventually my surroundings changed and so did the times. The town that I had spent my whole life in was so different now. The population was getting younger and more colorful. It had gotten so colorful over the last couple of years that my skin color which had been the majority for years was quickly becoming the minority. With so many new and different faces in town I actually became paranoid. Because I had not associated with anyone that wasn't my skin color since I was a young boy I didn't know what to expect of them. My father had always been there to give me wisdom on how to avoid and deal with them but he was gone. He left me alone in this new world. But I was a man, a little older but still a man no less. I would be comforted and keep myself protected by my values and beliefs.

   Even when the people moved in next door I avoided them. I ignored them when I saw them outside. I didn't speak to them when they said hi. Hell I never even bothered to make eye contact. The other neighbors embraced them like they were family but I didn't. I couldn't. Doing so would go against everything I was taught as boy. Against everything I had done as an adult. So I stuck to my guns...people of different skin colors didn't mix PERIOD. I did however secretly watch them. I kept track of their movements just to be sure they weren't plotting to get me. The family had been next door for about three years and for the past two Christmas holiday's they had given me a Christmas card. I never opened them but for some odd reason I never threw them away either. So this Christmas Eve would be no different. I heard a knock on my door and when I peered outside I saw the wife from next door who was very pregnant holding another Christmas card. I ignored her knocks and she eventually left leaving the card in the mailbox. I couldn't understand why after all these years of not even speaking to or even acknowledging that her and her family lived next door that they would continue to bring me a Christmas card. I guessed some folks just couldn't take a hint. That night I fell asleep on the couch covered in my favorite blanket. The fireplace was glowing brightly warming the room. The warmth and glow invited me into a deep slumber and I was eager to accept it after a long day. It was the sound of a dog barking that interrupted my sleep. As I tried to ignore the barking I recognized it's familiar sound. It was the neighbor's dog. I remember thinking to myself that it wasn't normal for them to let her out so late. Then suddenly I heard the breaking of glass and banging on the door accompanied by the sounds of a woman screaming and a man yelling. I tried to get off the couch but my body seemed to be paralyzed. Then in an instant I was heaved up off the couch and into the air by a strange man. I tried to resist but my limps just didn't have the strength to fight off my attacker. I couldn't gather my voice to scream for help either. My lungs felt as if they were clogged and the screams in my throat never made it out. My eyes were burning as if they had been doused in acid. I was in a complete panic and I was powerless to react. As quickly as I had been lifted off my couch I was suddenly thrust into the cold air of the night then laid gently on the cold pavement of the street. I tried to focus my old eyes preparing for the assault that I was sure to come from the strange man.

   As my vision finally began to clear up I see the face of my attacker. It belongs to the husband of the family next door and he is not alone. Standing beside him hovering over me is his wife. She is speaking to me but the sounds from her mouth don't reach my ears. They both have a look of sadness and worry on their faces. Suddenly I hear the blaring sounds of fire engines and ambulances. The words of the wife become audible. She is asking "Can you hear me?! Are you OK?! Are you hurt?!". Still disoriented and confused I become angry. How dare these people violate me by invading my home? How dare they disrespect me by touching me? Trying to make sense of the situation, I question why after almost three years did they become bold enough to mix with me. Then as quickly as my rage had built up it was torn down and replaced by despair. As various people arrived on the scene watching the spectacle that was taking place my line of sight takes me to the place that is the cause of all the commotion. When my eyes connect my heart breaks. The house I had grown up in was engulfed in a massive blaze. I try to stand to my feet but the husband gently restricts me saying "You're safe now but there is nothing you can do for the house. I'm sorry". I see firefighters in full gear attempting to douse the blaze with water but it is clear the flames have won. As the paramedics put me into the truck and tend to me I overhear them ask my neighbors "does he have any family we can contact?" The wife sadly responds "No. We are all he has now." I begin to cry because she is right. Every thing that I had was in that house. Every one that I had loved was dead. I began to weep uncontrollably. The wife leaves her husband's side and climbs into the truck. She sits down beside my gurney and speaks softly to me as she holds my hand "you can stay with us until you get back on your feet Mr. Wilson." At that moment I experienced the epitome of shame because she knew my name and I hadn't even cared after all these years to know hers. I look at my hand which is completely covered but securely held in between her own and at that moment I see that the color of the skin on my hand isn't visible. It was there in the back of that ambulance that I realized that the color of a person's skin didn't make them invisible. I remembered why I had questioned my father all those years past. There was a time when skin color wasn't an issue to me. It was then, that something deep inside me that had been long buried by discrimination and misunderstanding had finally been uncovered. I finally accepted that despite what I had been taught, despite how I had lived and treated people that the color of a person's skin didn't matter. In that moment of clarity I was thankful that I had been given a rare opportunity to unlearn what I had learned. I had received compassion from people that I had only given contempt to because of the color of their skin. As my childhood home burned to the ground so did my ideas of race relations. The cost of being a racist was to great to pay in this day and age. I was ashamed but grateful at the same time. Ashamed that it took something of this magnitude to awaken my understanding and acceptance. But I was grateful that other people didn't view life with the same bigotry that I had for countless years because had my neighbors did...I would have died a racist.


Be BETTER TODAY, than you were yesterday
TWIL

A GOOD Man WANTS A GOOD Woman

   Being a man is tough not only because we have so many expectations heaped upon us at birth or because of the numerous hurdles we have to clear before reaching adulthood. But being a man is exceedingly difficult because we have to deal with women. Even though a woman is man's ultimate measure of success, a woman is also man's greatest mystery and challenge. The truth is every man wants a good woman in his life becomes she brings a calm that he needs in a world filled with chaos. A good woman essentially represents the highest level of achievement that a man can have. A good woman automatically upgrades a man's status and gives him immediate credibility. In a good woman, he has a lady with an attractive face and figure that makes other men envious. She is a supportive partner that can help him build a home. And most importantly she becomes the sacred vessel that brings his offspring into the world thus continuing the rein of his lineage. She completes him by becoming the one person that when all is said and done he can rely on to remain in his corner and encourage him to be great despite overwhelming odds. But what makes a woman a GOOD WOMAN. Well I will tell you but only if you are willing to listen...you are?! That's great!!! There are 3 qualities that a good man looks for when he is searching for a GOOD woman.

She must have confidence. She must be loyal. And above all else she must be understanding. What?! Am I serious?! YES!!! Granted, men are ATTRACTED to a woman with a pretty face, a big ole booty and a pair of cushy boobies but that is not what keeps us CONNECTED to a woman. Confidence, Loyalty and the ability to be Understanding will keep a man WANTING to stay and not feeling that he is obligated to stay. Confidence in a woman is a very attractive trait. It tells a man that she doesn't need him to lead her to success but that she is comfortable enough in her own to allow him to lead as she walks beside him. Loyalty is a simple concept but one that is rarely expressed. A woman's loyalty to a man is something that he will ALWAYS respect. A man knows that eventually he will fuck up bad but it's the knowledge that she will support him and forgive him for the stupid shit he does that gives a man the sense of security that he will have someone that still believes in him even when he fails. A woman's loyalty is hard to acquire so he knows once he has it he will do whatever it takes to keep it. Understanding. A woman's ability to be understanding cannot be undervalued or taken for granted.

   Many women have the desire to nurture which can interfere with a man's ability to grow. A good woman has to be able to understand that he may not always vent about his problems, he may not always ask for help, he may hide his pain. But most important is that a woman HAS TO UNDERSTAND that she is not a man! So therefore she will never understand what it is like to be one and should not under any circumstance try to take his place as one. If a woman exhibits these three traits Confidence, Loyalty and Understanding she can put herself in a position to elevate herself to the status of a GOOD woman and therefore become attractive to and in a better position to remain connected to a GOOD man. Oh one more point a minor/major point...a good woman should constantly make her man's dick hard, not his life. A man that is happy with the life he shares with a woman will make every effort to make her life happy as well. No man wants to be constantly at odds with the woman he loves. He wants a woman that he can respect and appreciate. He wants to know that his lady respects AND accepts his role and the work he puts in. He wants and has to be the good man that protects and provides all the needs and wants that his good woman deserves. He needs to have that reassurance every now and again that his woman depends on him (even if we both know you don't). So can you be a GOOD woman? Cause if you can then just be patient in your search for love and companionship. You will find your equal because every good man wants a good woman.


Be BETTER TODAY, than you were yesterday...
TWIL