Trust me bruh, I can relate. You're sitting on the couch watching the game, not bothering nobody...just relaxing and you hear your lovely lady speak those dreaded words..."baby, we need to talk". In your head you are screaming "What. The. FUCK?! Not this again!" Because you know just like Dave Chappelle said "that every time she says we need to talk that means ya'll need to talk about some shit that YOU gotta do...ya'll aint never gotta talk about shit SHE needs to do." So your chill mood has been instantly ruined because you know how bad these "talks" can get. You become defensive in every answer you give and your body language reflects how much you absolutely DO NOT want to engage in this discussion with her. She sees this and immediately begins to think 1.) you don't want to make time for her. 2.) you have something to hide and 3.) you don't care about her feelings and concerns. And she is right, she is always right even when she is dead wrong. Why? I'll tell you why?! Because even though none of the above is true her emotions and feelings make it real and when it's real IN HER MIND, it makes it true to her! And in the end that's all that matters. So now ya'll are both in a pissy mode because the communication has not been made clear and now the topics that need to be discussed and addressed are not and the both of you are now frustrated and mad as hell.
So who wins in that situation?! Well truthfully you both lose big but it is YOU the man that will have to pay the biggest penalties. And do you know what that those penalties are...yes you guessed it AGGRAVATION, DISTANCE and the ABSENCE OF SEX. She will reward your aggravation with distance and for what she has perceived as a diss she will cut your water off aka no action, no hot buns, no freaky sneaky, no horizontal hokey pokey...NO SEX! Now she won't consciously withdrawal sex but it will happen. Why because men are physical and women are emotional. She will not be able to forget her emotions long enough to allow you, the one she is upset with, to get her sexually aroused long enough to engage in some good love making. So what do you do as a man, you don't want your lady pissed off all the time because you do love her and want her to feel appreciated and you damn sure don't want blue balls or an ignored erection...so what do you do?! Listening?! YOU TALK WITH HER! Do what?! Yes you gotta stop what you're doing and talk with her when she asks you to do so. Granted I know it goes against every fiber of your manhood to openly speak about your feelings and share your emotions but listening to her is EXACTLY what you have to do. Notice I said talk WITH, not at or to her. You have to communicate with her in a fashion that makes her feel important. In a way that lets her know you are attentively listening to her concerns. She has to feel important in the sense that she is worthy of your direct attention and time. If you take the time to share what is in your head, listen to what is on her mind and freely discuss what you both expect and want to happen it will make the time spent together less hectic and more enjoyable for you both.
Arguments will not occur as much. Misunderstandings will not be a common thing and most importantly she isn't angry all the time or feeling neglected. You are contributing to her emotional roller coaster going up more often than it goes down and in the end, all that translates to a happy woman at home. Which means you my man, get to enjoy the game undisturbed hell she might even lay quietly in your lap while you do. You won't have to regret cussing her out in your head or out loud and not to be overlooked the added bonus of more happy sexy time! Trust me I know it's gets hard especially when it seems like she is always in your face. But remember if she didn't love you she wouldn't give a fuck what you did. She fusses and sweats you because she does care and she wants to be sure you care about her in return. Now I'm not saying let her walk over you and constantly disrespect you but pick your battles. Like my grandfather told before I got married, if you want to live happily with your woman you HAVE TO LEARN that if you want a piece you better keep the peace. Wise words from a decent man and very true indeed. Learn to communicate and do it often cause if you don't you will never find peace with her and she will never give you a piece either. Don't fight against it...your woman is always right and that's not a bad thing.
"Those that have greatness in them also possess the power...to bring greatness out of those around them." - TWIL
